Movie Review: The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

Eclipse main Movie Review: The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

Eclipse is the 3rd movie based off the series of hugely popular teen vampire novels from Mormon author Stephanie Meyer. Her goofy (but wildly successful) idea for the books basically revolves around a teenage Emo girl named Bella (played by Kirsten Stewart) who is in love with an undead vampire who protects her but refuses to turn her or have sex with her. The laughable abstinence makes the heart grow fonder message aside, she’s clearly tapped into something that both teenage girls, and their Moms can both enjoy. By sucking the sex and gore out of the vampire lore, I felt her first two movies often felt listless in between subpar action scenes. Eclipse improves upon things drastically. The pace is quicker, the mix of violence and romance is more adept and often quite cool and interesting. The dialogue is still sub George Lucas and the acting is barely there, but the flashes of humor help things move along. All credit is due to bringing in director David Slade, who directed the gory and very good vampire flick 30 Days of Night. He makes Eclipse darker and more menacing than either of the first two movies.

Eclipse is about the love triangle between Bella, her undead brooding suitor Edward Cullen, and an often shirtless Native American named Jacob (a ripped and roided up Taylor Lautner), who can turn into a wolf on cue. He loves Bella but hates vampires……along with wearing a shirt apparently. To keep things moving, director Slade tosses in vampire attacks every 15 minutes or so to break up the gooey romance movie love triangle. A vampire army formed by the vengeful Victoria is out to kill Bella and its up to The Cullen Clan and Jacob’s Abercrombie Wolfpack to put aside their differences and save the day. There are also some interesting (often dark) flashbacks including an implied rape (way to push the PG-13 rating guys) and some cool fighting in the climatic battle.

Eclipse 2 Movie Review: The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

I look better shirtless than you do, na na na na na !

The action scenes and CG effects are much improved and the movie is overall a lot better than it has any right to be. The audience of pumped up teen girls makes for an amusing theatre experience. Screaming every time Jacob pops up shirtless (which is so often I lost track) and cheering on Edward after a make-out session with Emo queen Bella, they were having a hoot. I just want the final movie called Breaking Dawn to finally have the one thing The Twilight Saga has always been missing so far, some hot sex. Edward f–king Bella. I’m just saying, he’s a creature of darkness and a killer, not a meek runway model. I want some Anne Rice in my vampires. Save the pro-abstinence nonsense for a boring Sunday sermon.

Grade: B

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